BulgingButtons

Not bad for a fat girl

Monthly Archives: January 2014


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Under Pressure

Yikes! I’m amazed at how quickly I’ve reverted to the stressball I was before winter break. I’m feeling a little too much pressure, and I’m not dealing with it all that well at the moment. School has been back in session only eight days since break, and I’ve missed two of those days. I took a sick day last week and slept virtually all day. On Monday of this week I had a professional day of collaboration with other educators. It was fabulous. Those other eight though…

stressedIt’s not the kids. The kids are fine. It’s not the other teachers. They are amazing. What is it? I guess it’s all the demands. In those eight days I’ve been visited by my administrator at least four times. I’ve also been visited by our instructional coach and another coach sent in from the district. I’m being watched.

Now lest you think I’m “in trouble” or a slacker, I assure you I am not. HOWEVER, and this is obviously a big however (you did see the all caps, right?), my winter test scores weren’t great. Not just mine, the whole grade level. In fact we’re all being visited. I’m not sure it’s necessary or even helpful. Long story short, many hours have been spent discussing the situation, and measures are being taken to correct it. I hate being in this position. All of us do. We are professionals. We work hard. Really really hard.

I typically arrive at school by 7:30, take a 25 minute lunch unless I have kids come to do some work, then it’s closer to 12 minutes, and stay until 5 or later. Then I work at home many evenings and weekends. Why? Well, there are 29 sets of papers to be graded, scores to be entered, phone calls and emails to be returned, lessons to be planned and created, tests and practice sheets to be written, and test data to be evaluated. Then there are meetings to attend, forms to fill out, book orders to complete, displays to create, pencils to sharpen, web sites to update, and so much more.

This is not to complain, just to enlighten. The whole image of teachers working 8 to 3 and taking summers off is a fairy tale. Most of us love teaching and love kids, which is why we do it. None of us got into education for fame or fortune. But this is crazy. This feeling of never quite doing enough, never quite having enough time, never quite giving all the students exactly what they need at all times. It’s a lot. It’s too much. I have to cut myself a little slack or I won’t be any good to them. I know what I’m doing. I know I’m a good teacher. I can’t let the current situation get to me, or it will end up sabotaging my efforts. I just need to take a step back and breathe. In, out, in , out… I can do this. I have to.


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An Empathy Boost and Reminder

628x471Way back when, I started this blog with a post about an inspirational young man named Ryan, whose story I watched on Extreme Weight Loss.  In a nutshell, he was in an accident and lost an arm. He lost confidence, gained weight, and ended up working with Chris Powell on the show to get healthy and fit. It’s a great, uplifting story.

The take away for me was if he can do it, so can I. Great message, but I still haven’t done it. Then again I don’t exactly have Chris Powell as my roommate, but that’s another post for another day (or maybe not).

Fast forward to my recent vacation in Hawai’i. On our cruise there was a couple that we bumped into several times. They were at least a decade older than me, and they got married in Maui on the second day of the cruise. They were a friendly, outgoing couple clearly in love with life. They did have to do some things a little differently though, because, as he said, in a match of motorcycle vs. semi, the motorcycle seldom wins. One of his legs was prosthetic and the other was horribly damaged. It was clear where large areas of tissue had been removed. Hawai’i is warm this time of year, and, like most everyone else, this gentleman wore shorts.

We went on several excursions and these folks were there with us. He used a scooter for long distances, but could walk short distances and up and down the steps of busses and vans. Yes, it took a little longer, and I imagine that there was a fair amount of frustration and even pain involved to get and out of vehicles and around to different sights, but there was always a smile and a joke.

I think the universe is trying to remind me. I saw it before. I got the message. I just haven’t acted on it. I have all my parts in reasonably good working order. These men that I admire do not. Do they let that stop them from being active and achieving goals? No. I shouldn’t either. Thanks, universe, I needed that reminder.


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Please Stop By

I admit it, I’m sick and my content today pretty much sucks. Sappy 70’s songs from am radio? Songs that I don’t even particularly like? Really? Yes, that’s what I came up with for today. So sorry.

My nose is stuffy, my throat is killing me, my hands are frozen, and my head is on fire. I’m feeling like poop. We’ve all been there, and it’s not a fun place to be. In between naps today I put up my horrible 70’s flashback in hopes that someone, anyone, would stop by to visit me. Few of you have. Sniff. I swear I’m not contagious over the internet!

images-1This reminds me of a time back in the days when I was a candle lady. I did at home parties for one of those companies, and I really did love their products. I enjoyed doing the shows, meeting new people, and sharing decorating ideas. One year, as the holidays were nearing, I had some extra product and decided to do an Open House. I made up adorable flyers, I let all of my contacts know I was doing it, and I went around the neighborhood personally handing out the invitations. I set up a beautiful display in my living room, put out large signs in the neighborhood, and waited. And waited. And waited. Not one person showed up.

I felt like such a loser. That’s how I feel some days with this blog. Why don’t people stop by? Sometimes it happens on days when the content is a little iffy, like today, but other times I feel like I’ve written a whiz bang piece, and nobody takes the time to read it. Of course the flip side is true too. How many times have there been lots of visitors when there isn’t even anything new to read? Not that I want to discourage anyone from stopping by at any time. There’s plenty to sift through on the blog, and I imagine that I’m the only one who has actually read every post, so there should be something “new to you” even if there isn’t a new post.

So there you have it, my invitation to you to keep BulgingButtons in your bookmarks, and to stop by often. Please comment, good or bad, and I’ll do my best to get back to you quickly. Without readers like you, there isn’t much point to blogging.