BulgingButtons

Not bad for a fat girl


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2020, Take Four

I want to write the most epic New Year post in the history of New Year posts, but I know that won’t happen.

How do I know? Because this is the fourth attempt I’m making. The words keep coming out all wrong, so I keep hitting the delete key. Maybe my perfectionist leanings are showing themselves. I need to just roll with it. Maybe that should be my mantra for 2020… roll with it.

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I think I’ll end with that thought… roll with it. I’m going to try this out for a bit and see how it goes as a life philosophy. I’ll get back to you with my findings, maybe.

Meanwhile I hope you have a fantastic 2020. May you be healthy, happy, and whole.

 

 


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Cleaning Up 2019

The last day of the year seems like a good time to do a little housekeeping, both literally and figuratively.

Literally speaking, I’m still slowing putting my master bedroom and bathroom back together (and don’t even ask me about my closet). Having a full on renovation really took a toll on this house. Sure, the result is incredible, but the aftermath is not much fun. Still, as I soak in my six-foot tub or indulge in a shower that’s more lovely than any other I’ve ever used, I don’t mind the mess as much.

At least I finally feel like I have some time to tame the mess. Being a teacher is really a gift at this time of year. There’s time to catch up on appointments and chores, and there’s also time to relax, recharge, and reinvent myself and my practice. Teaching is an art, and like any art it requires reflection and refinement. This time off allows me to focus on those things. Nothing like being alone in a quiet house (well, with the dog) to force you to face what’s going on around you.

What’s going on around me (or maybe inside me) is a desire to bring my life back into balance. That means more focus on home and family, more focus on long-range goals, and more focus on what success means to me. This is where paying off my credit card bill (which I had always done in the past, but somehow lost track of), cleaning up my house (it’s getting there), and working on becoming a National Board Certified Teacher (this is kind of overwhelming) come into play. Add in a few interesting life twists (all good) and you’ve got a 2019 that I’m ready to pack away in favor of a bright, shiny, new 2020. It’s going to be a busy one, but a good one, I can just tell. I wish you a bright, shiny 2020 as well.


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Bathroom Beautiful

It’s done!unnamed

Finally.

I have a lovely new bathroom and I’m so pleased. Is it perfect? No. Is it infinitely nicer than it was? Absolutely.

I need to stop seeing the tiny little flaws and focus on the overall success of the project.

Why does human nature do that do us? Ninety-nine things go right and we fixate on the one that doesn’t. Ninety-nine wins, and one loss. Ninety-nine compliments. and one complaint. Ninety-nine hits. and one miss. Ninety-nine receptions, and one turnover. Ninety-nine on time departures, and one delay. You get the idea.

Sometimes even one miss is too many, but most of the time failure isn’t terminal. And who defines failure, anyway? Most of the time there’s no clear line between success and failure. Shades of grey abound in the world, but we often fail to notice them. Small victories, small steps in the right directions… these are valuable even if they aren’t earth-shaking.

My bathroom remodel has accomplished several goals, first of which was providing a usable shower space. That goal has been stunningly accomplished. I also have a beautiful new bathtub, with a sweet little chandelier above it. I’ve always dreamed of having that.

I’m happy with the project. I’m happy that I live a life where events like a bathroom remodel are considered an inconvenience. I’m reminded that there are people who don’t have plumbing or clean water. I’m so fortunate, and standing under the warm gentle spray of the shower head reminds me of that every morning.