BulgingButtons

Not bad for a fat girl


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Did I Really Write That?

I’ve been at this blogging thing since June of 2013, so a solid five years now. In that time I’ve published nearly 700 posts. Most of them have a fair number of words to them. Some, however, are quite short, and feature photos or a video instead of my usual ramblings. Still, that’s quite a few posts.

The thing about it is, I can’t actually remember writing all of those posts. It’s almost as if I was in some sort of stupor when I published them. Not all of them, of course, but I have stumbled across several that make me scratch my head in wonder. Are these really my words? Did I really say that?3d-clipart-question-mark-20.png

It’s not that I disagree with my past self, or that I’m embarrassed by anything I’ve written. At least so far I haven’t been. It’s just that it seems like the act of writing should leave more of an indelible mark. I ought to remember my words, as I remember the quilts I’ve made or the scrapbooks I’ve created.

Maybe words are just too common. Maybe it’s more like trying to remember meals I’ve cooked. Some stand out, for various reasons, but most just fade into the background to be forgotten. Maybe that’s how it is with words. Sometimes they stick, but other times they say their piece, only to be quickly forgotten.

I don’t mind, really. Sometimes it’s fun to see the suggested posts at the bottom of my screen and click on an old post. Sometimes it’s like seeing an old friend, but other times it feels brand new.


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Feeling Better Already

I’m not sure if it was the two-week vacation or the plan that my health care provider and I put into place, or maybe a combination of the two, but I’m feeling so much better. My outlook has improved, my energy has increased, and in general things are looking up. Not that they were awful before; they weren’t. But wow, I really do feel better. In fact I feel more like myself.

I also feel like I’m ready to start taking care of myself again. I’ve been moving more, which actually feels pretty good. Additionally, my house is full of fresh fruits and vegetables, and I’m enjoying them. Moderation is the word of the day, although it’s been a bugaboo for me in the past.

I’m pretty sure there’s something messed up with the pleasure sensors in my brain. It seems that when they’re activated they completely override the the satiation function. It works like this:

me: Yum, this is delicious. I’ll just have a bit.65190869-stock-vector-fat-glutton-ginger-cat-with-empty-bowl-on-white-background-vector-illustration.jpg

also me: This is SO good. KEEP EATING.

me: Well, maybe just a little more.

also me: DON’T STOP. THERE’S PLENTY.

me: I’m full. I need to stop eating this.

also me: Are you kidding? This is TOO GOOD. DON’T STOP.

me: I ate it all. I feel awful. Why do I do this?

also me: But it was SO GOOD.

See how that works? It’s counterproductive, to say the least. At the moment, though, it seems to be in check. I mean, who’s going to go nuts over plums?

Anyway, tomorrow it’s back to school for teachers, and the beginning of a brand new school year. It’s a perfect time for a fresh start, so here I am, ready to go.

Enjoy your summer, or what’s left of it, and imagine me and my kiddos back in school (it’s so early!!!)

 


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Damn You, Girl Scouts! Seven Problems With Girl Scout Cookies

Okay, I’m not as much of a monster as the title may imply, but really? Cookie sales so early in the year? So close to the resolutions I didn’t make?

Really?

I know that there are different Girl Scout cookie sales windows in different regions, but here in my community the cookie sales have begun. This would be less problematic if any, or better yet all, of the conditions weren’t an issue:

  1. They are so yummy.
  2. I need to get healthier.
  3. There is an adorable little girl scout just waiting for me each morning at school (my dear friend’s kid, whom I’ve known since before her birth).
  4. There are several other girl scouts waiting for me at school.
  5. I used to be a troop leader and sympathize.
  6. I believe in supporting children’s organizations.
  7. They are so frigging yummy. Especially Tagalongs. And Thin Mints. Of course Thin Mints.

So there you have it. My cookie problem is back, and along with it a renewed battle to find the balance between a yummy life and long and healthy life. I’m sure there must be a balance somewhere, but I just haven’t found the sweet spot yet.