Parenting | BulgingButtons

March 11, 2014
by BulgingButtons 7 Comments

Five Days of Fix Ups

No beach vacation this time, but check out that pedicure!

I’m on Spring Break this week. Woo Hoo! Five glorious days away from the routine of school. Five days of relative peace and quiet. Five days without meetings or discipline issues or grading papers. Five days to rest, relax, and recharge. Five days to build up my reserves in order to face the dreaded final push before testing.

I decided that during these five days I would purposefully take care of myself. I would handle the neglected tasks that help me to look and feel my best. I would take care of the business of taking care of me.

Yesterday I started with a haircut. It was long overdue, and I walked out of the salon feeling ten pounds lighter and five years younger. Okay, that’s an exaggeration, but I was happy with the cut and I do feel better looking in the mirror.

On my list for the week is an appointment to have routine lab work done (not fun, but vital for my health), a appointment to have my teeth cleaned, and a pedicure. Throw in some time with girlfriends, a movie date with my son, and a day out with my mother and son together, and I have a busy week.

I’m glad the whole week isn’t filled with the chores of life, like taking the dog to the vet and groomers, and getting new tires. Those items are on the docket this week too, but they don’t dominate it, since I have these other things planned.

It’s a full week, but I don’t feel at all stressed. Each day I have one thing planned that will move me closer to the goal of looking and feeling great. What better way to spend a week off than that?

March 3, 2014
by BulgingButtons 4 Comments

Stuck on Hope

My boy ten years ago.

I have this writing assignment that I have to do. It’s way overdue. In fact the course ended. Still, I want to do the assignment. My teacher is a friend and amazing writer herself. She has been overly patient with me. Maybe I need a swift kick in the rear to get it done. I WANT to get it done. I just can’t seem to do it.

I think I’m stuck on the prompt. The focus of the class is using the experience of parenthood as a framework for writing. The particular prompt I’m stuck on is “hope.” It seems too big. It seems too vague. How on earth do I even poke a stick at this one?

I imagine that the idea is to form some sort of concrete response to the prompt as it applies to my son. I tried this approach, but it seemed stilted and dishonest. Yes, I have lots of hopes for him, but they all came out as a kind of bland pablum. I couldn’t bring any passion to the piece. It worried me.

Am I a bad mother? Do I truly believe the things I wrote? Why wasn’t there any fire to the piece? It could have been written by any parent for any child. It didn’t seem connected to me or my son at all. In fact, it seemed as impersonal as a piece of trendy wall art picked up from the local craft store. You know the ones with the pithy sayings? Of course you do. You may even have them in your home. If you do, I’m sorry for not agreeing with your design aesthetic. Live, Laugh, Love. Yeah, right. If only it were that easy. Some days it just isn’t.

What it boils down to is this, I hope he knows, really knows deep in his core, that I love him and that I’ve always done the best I could for him. I hope he understands that although I mess up in a hundred different ways every single day, I believe that the choices I make are ones that will ultimately help him to be a successful person. I hope he figures out all the stupid stuff that life throws at him, and I hope he manages, somehow, to get his grades up so he has as many options for his future as possible. I hope he understands that he has options. Maybe that’s not personal enough, but it feels pretty personal to me.

I hope that boy grows to be a man that the boy can admire. I hope he remembers his worth and his sense of kindness and his playfulness. I hope he navigates acne and braces and learning to drive and making smart choices without too many permanent scars. I hope his life is rich and fulfilling. I hope he loves and is loved deeply. I know, it’s starting to sound sappy again. I can’t help it. I love that boy. I hope, no matter what comes his way, he always remembers that.

February 25, 2014
by BulgingButtons 11 Comments

Oh Shingles

I was ready for a quiet dinner out with my sweetheart. It was to be a simple little Tuesday night date night, precipitated by the request of a realtor to show our home over the typical dinner hour. No problem.

A quick tidy up involving a swiffer and a vacuum was all that was required, and we were ready to head out the door.

That’s when the phone rang. It was my son’s father. My first thought was that we had somehow mixed up schedules and my son was stranded somewhere without a ride. I quickly answered, only to be told that he probably has shingles. Again.

This boy is nearly 16 years old. Last year he was nearly 15 years old. That’s when he got it for the first time. I was stunned. I didn’t think young people, let alone teens, could get it. I thought it was an old person’s disease. I was wrong.

Shingles is ugly. Do not google it. Trust me. His case isn’t nearly as bad as the horror show you’ll see on the internet (thank goodness). That being said, it’s not attractive, and it’s uncomfortable. The good news is, it isn’t contagious. Still, it looks pretty nasty, and people will want to avoid you if they notice it. His outbreak is on his neck, so it’s hard to hide.

Off to urgent care we went, since his dad had to get to work at job number two. Don’t ask. I filled out all the paperwork as we (my ever patient sweetheart and I) waited for them to arrive. After a few wrong turns, they finally showed up, and we did the switch. He was taken right away (since I had already done all the paperwork) and sure enough, the doctor declared it shingles.

They checked his records. Last year he was seen on February 24. Today is February 25. Is this going to be a thing?

The doctor asked if he was taking his state tests in school this week. He finished today. Apparently stress triggers shingles. Although I’m not sure that these tests exactly stress him out. He’s pretty good at tests. At least the standardized type.

Anyway, one dinner and one $97 (with insurance) prescription later, he is back at his dad’s and working on his homework. At least I hope he is. I don’t want to nag him though, it might aggravate his stress.