November | 2013 | BulgingButtons

November 10, 2013
by BulgingButtons 7 Comments

Daily Prompt: The Perfect Game

I’ve always enjoyed playing games. Let me clarify that statement a bit. I’ve always enjoyed playing board games. I also like word games and guessing games and many other types of games, but some games I definitely do not enjoy.

I do not enjoy the kinds of games that people play with each other’s emotions. I do not enjoy the types of games that are often referred to as office politics. Forget those games. I appreciate clear and honest communication. Games should be left for recreational purposes only.

As a child, I played lots of games outdoors in the neighborhood. We were always running around, getting plenty of fresh air and exercise. Some of the games were “real” like Spud and kickball, while others were the product of our collaborative imaginations. Bean soccer was one such made up game. I don’t recall the rules, but if memory serves me, there were many. We didn’t have an obese generation, because we were all outside playing, as long as the weather would permit.

Where I grew up we often had bad weather. Since my generation did not have computers, video games, or more than three television stations (none of them with non-stop children’s programming), we had to figure out other things to do. I loved to read, draw, and make things, like legos or crafts. I also loved board games. I remember playing Careers and Life as a little girl, thinking about what my future would hold.

I never lost that love, and was thrilled when, as a young twenty-something, I worked with a group of people who would regularly hold a game night. We would bring our favorite games, break up into groups, and play. My favorite game of that era was Trivial Pursuit, hands down. My brain has always been crammed full of useless trivia, and this was my opportunity to let some of it out! Of course there were snacks and beverages, and lots of laughter. I remember those game nights fondly.

As a middle aged quilter, I had the wonderful opportunity to go on several quilting retreats with some remarkable people. Our group also had quite a few women who loved games, and we would bring some along. We would take periodic breaks from sewing to organize a game. Balderdash was a particular favorite with this group. The laughter and chance to let down our hair was priceless.

As a young mother I engaged my son in board games. They were wonderful for learning to take turns, count, and make decisions. They also helped him to develop his attention span, and learn to handle both winning and losing with grace. Most board games are more fun with three players, so his father was frequently recruited as well. We spent many happy times playing Candyland and Chutes and Ladders. Over time those games were replaced by Sorry and Clue, then Risk and Monopoly. When he was very small someone gave us a Pokemon Master Trainer game. We held on to it until he was old enough (I think the box said seven but I’m pretty sure he got it when he was four or five). It was probably his favorite board game. He loved Pokemon, and this game delighted him. After all these years I’m pretty sure we still have it somewhere.

I still enjoy the opportunity to take time away from real life and totally connect with others by playing a game. We are all focused on the same thing, there is no technology pulling our attention away from one another, and we put our other concerns on hold for a short while. I think I will always enjoy playing board games. Oh, and if we’re playing Trivial Pursuit, look out, I’m still pretty good.

You’re set to play poker (or Scrabble or something else . . .) with a group of four. Write a story set during this game. Or, describe the ideal match: the players, the relationships — and the hidden rivalries.

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November 9, 2013
by BulgingButtons 12 Comments

Daily Prompt: Connect the Dots

Scour the news for an entirely uninteresting story. Consider how it connects to your life. Write about that.

The news is full of all sorts of stories from the horrifying to the absurd. The story I chose caught my eye because it was about a father’s unwillingness to take his child to McDonald’s and the fallout from that decision. Really?

In a nutshell, it’s about divorce, choices, and outside interference from psychologists, lawyers, and judges. It’s not about McDonald’s at all. Here’s the story: Dad gets almost 5 year old for dinner once a week. Boy wants McDonald’s for dinner. Day says no. Boy tantrums. Dad says anything BUT McDonald’s or no dinner. Boy chooses no dinner. Dad returns boy to mom. Dad deemed unfit parent. Dad’s visitation with son is on the line and Dad sues psychologist who recommends limiting visitation. Big. Ugly. Mess.

How sad that a parent can’t say no to his child without being accused of something sinister. Of course this isn’t about going to McDonald’s or not going to McDonald’s. It’s about finding an in, a chink in the armor, the Achille’s Heel, of your adversary. I’m sure son was upset at being taken back to mom without dinner. I’m sure mom was unhappy that son was upset and unfed. But somewhere, she had a flash of brilliance and used the incident to further her own agenda of limiting son’s exposure to dad. Maybe she has good reason. I don’t know these people. Maybe dad is an awful person on another level. But this isolated incident is not indicative of anything troublesome. In fact, I think it’s decent parenting. Sometimes we say no, and we mean it. That is an important lesson for an almost five year old.

I’m so glad I was able to teach those types of lessons to my son when he was small without any fear that his father would somehow twist them and use them against me. Would the incident where I walked out of the grocery store with a screaming three year old, my full cart stashed in the beer cooler (at the manager’s suggestion) have caused me to be labeled unfit? Would the scolding and swat on the bottom after running away in a busy mall have labeled me abusive? I don’t know, but those incidents could have been twisted and transformed into something ugly and harmful.

I think we are too quick to want to further our own agendas without looking at what is best for the greater good, in this instance a boy who really needs love, guidance, and limits from the adults who love him.

Dad Called Unfit for Denying Son McDonald’s: Lawsuit (newser.com)

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November 8, 2013
by BulgingButtons 6 Comments

My Food Obsession – Why I Need a Kitchen Makeover

Here I go again. Thinking about food. Writing about food. Imagining all the delicious foods that I enjoy and wishing I had an elaborate banquet spread out in front of me. My imaginary feast is quite the opposite of the icky buffet I was subjected to the other night. I know my thoughts are wandering to food because I’m hungry, but really, I think about food often. I can’t help it. I eat. I enjoy eating. I think about eating. And when I think about eating, I think about what I might be eating.

We humans need fuel, like every other living thing. Unlike other living things, we fuel ourselves with an extraordinarily wide range of foods, many of them natural and wholesome and full of vitamins and minerals (I learned that from a cereal commercial). However, and this is a HUGE however, the vast majority of the food in my home isn’t of that variety. I would venture to say that’s true for many people. At least people who shop in grocery stores.

Oh sure, there are a few pitiful fruits and vegetables under my roof, but they’re the exception rather than the rule. Quick inventory: one rather dull looking apple, three overripe bananas, a tiny watermelon, two small pumpkins, a jar of pink grapefruit slices, and a bag of frozen green beans. I’m not proud.

The pumpkins are earmarked for pie, so they don’t count. The only thing those bananas are good for at this point is banana bread, so they’re off the list too. As for the watermelon, it’s for my son. I despise watermelon. I know, I know… everyone loves watermelon. I do not. I must be defective.

At least I don’t have a fridge packed full of processed frozen foods. It’s only about a quarter full. Of frozen, processed foods. There are potato pancakes from when? Last Hanukkah? And some breakfast sausage sandwiches (no, we don’t keep Kosher, thank you very much for inquiring). There are also some frozen sticks of butter and some chicken legs and an ice pack or two, but we don’t eat those, in case you weren’t sure.

The fridge holds salad dressing, ketchup, wine, and mayo. Oh, and eggs and cheese and yogurt and those grapefruit slices. There is a whole second fridge in the garage that my sweetheart says is for “venison and beer” but really it’s full of soda and water. Although sometimes beer does show up there.

The pantry is the last frontier. It has cereal and oatmeal, spaghetti sauce and canned soup, pasta and chili beans, and ravioi and ramen. It also has Maker’s Mark and baking supplies and the last of the orange filled Oreos. Writing food, I call it. Actually I just made that up. Like it?

It is apparent to me that this situation is not ideal. As a result, I want a kitchen makeover. Not just the flooring and the countertops and the sink and faucet and cabinets (although I would dearly LOVE any one of those things). No, the kind I want involves some trained expert who comes in, clears out the crap, and lays in supplies for a long and healthy life. Yummy ones, I might add. While they’re at it, they could teach me (and the sweetheart) some new recipes, and leave behind a personal chef (who will also do the shopping and cleaning up afterward). Sound good? If you know of anyone, please leave me their card.