BulgingButtons

Not bad for a fat girl


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What Do I Look Like?

This is a phrase we sometimes use when someone asks something of us that may seem unreasonable.

“Will you drive me to Target to buy an expensive game five minutes before closing time?”

“What do I look like, a chauffeur?”

“Will you make lasagna for dinner tonight?”

“What do I look like, a chef?”

“Did you bring my charger along?”

“What do I look like, a mind reader?”

But really, what do I look like? I have so many roles that I play that sometimes I think I need a wardrobe manager to help me keep my costumes straight. Case in point: the other night I sat down to write but I just couldn’t get into it. I wasn’t sure why, but then it hit me. I wasn’t in the correct outfit. I was in the clothes I had worn to school. Teacher clothes. I looked like an elementary school teacher. I felt like an elementary school teacher. I didn’t feel very writerly. I changed into something far more comfortable and got down to business.

Wearing the right clothes for the occasion makes a world of difference. You would feel like an idiot working out in a sexy dress, but wear your gym clothes to a fancy party and you’re equally uncomfortable.

Of course we’ve all heard the old saying, “the clothes make the man,” but how does that work? I think it has very little to do with the clothes themselves and almost everything to do with mindset. When you can look at yourself and say, “I look pretty good,” you have accomplished something. Most of us are our own worst critics, and if we can get that critic on board, we’re well on our way to convincing the rest of the world.

Sure, there are certain items that you put on that no matter what make you look great. There are others that don’t do you any favors. Honestly, though, a morose or angry woman in a stunning designer dress and heels has nothing on a joyful or placid woman in a t-shirt dress and flip-flops. imagesAudrey Hepburn in Funny Face is a perfect example. She rocks that awful sack of a dress in her first scene. Still, if you want to make an impression it does make sense to try to match your attire to your desire. Hey, I just made that up. I like it.

It reminds me of the old story of Mary Kay Ash, the founder of Mary Kay Cosmetics. According to the story, each morning she would dress in her best outfits, complete with hosiery, shoes, and accessories. Naturally she would do her make-up  and hair too. Then, when she was dressed to the nines, she would begin her day’s work. At her kitchen table. In her house. On the phone. Nobody saw her, but the confidence she gained from putting on her “uniform” or her “game face” helped her to become a force to be reckoned with. Had she made her calls in curlers and sweatpants I doubt we would know her name or her brand today.

This is the reason that I’m in favor of school uniforms for kids. I truly believe that they get into school mode when that uniform goes on. I don’t care if the uniform is a simple t-shirt and shorts. The idea is that it’s something specific just for the job of going to school and learning. There is also a sense of community that is built through the wearing of a uniform. Go to any major sporting event if you don’t believe me. Fans happily sport their team’s attire in order to become part of a community of supporters.

Listen, I’m no fashionista, and ultimately everyone wears what they want to anyway, but for me being a writer entails donning comfy clothes with stretchy waistbands. It may not be haute couture, but what do I care? After all, what do I look like, a model?


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Giving the People What They Want – Whatever That Might Be

Dear Readers,

My hope is to share with you content that you enjoy reading. I’m trying to do that in a way that is interesting and engaging. I’ve been looking at the blog stats and have come to the somewhat painful realization that my college statistics course was zero preparation for distilling the information I’m currently facing. ziggy-phone-survey-cartoon-waste-of-timeActually, that’s not quite it. It’s not the realization that’s painful, it was the statistics course and its accompanying MINITAB computer labs that were painful. In graduate school someone gave me the sage advice to take my statistics class pass/fail. Remembering back to my undergrad experience, I took that advice. Mercifully, I passed.

As interesting as all that may be, it’s just back story. Something I am told time and again to avoid in my writing. I guess old habits die hard. Here’s the crux of the situation: I want to know what you, the reader, want to see on BulgingButtons. From the start it’s been a cute little self-absorbed blog about my life as a fat girl. It’s branched out from there to include my life in general, including some thoughts on parenting my dear son, with bits about my teaching career, a little about my long neglected quilt projects, and a fair amount about the wonderful world of words, aka writing.

I sometimes write about health related topics, or the world of fat girl fashion. I also write about my food obsession, both positive and negative, and about my ongoing efforts to get my fat behind in gear, i.e. exercise. Some days this is more challenging than others. Oh, and challenges. I have the ongoing 47 for 47 challenge, and the NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo challenges for the month of November have kept me quite busy as well. 11212I also did a series of Daily Passions Prompts, and I have regularly written to the WordPress Daily prompts.

I suppose I’m not looking for a new direction exactly, because I really like sharing my thoughts in all different directions, but I do wonder what aspects of the blog appeal to you most, and what parts are your least favorite (or just not interesting to you). I imagine the quilters have all left the building, as my poor neglected projects page hasn’t had any action (much like my poor neglected quilt projects). And anyone seeking recipes has probably moved on, because I haven’t shared any. But I know that lots of you have chosen to stick around. I’d love to know why.

I’m ready for the feedback, bring it on! What do you see as the strengths and weaknesses of BulgingButtons, and what would you like to see more and less of here?

Thanks in advance for your well thought out and detailed comments! (See what I did there? Clever, no?)

With love and orange-filled Oreos (hey, I have to get rid of them somehow!),

BB


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No Wonder I Look So Fat


That’s what I said when I watched this video. Ok, I’m kidding. I know the real reason I look so fat is because I am. But at least my videos and photos are an honest representation of me. Now before you read another word take a moment and click on the link above to watch a model transformed before your very eyes.

I knew models were airbrushed, and I knew that they were made leaner. I also knew that their cup sizes were regularly modified. What I didn’t realize is that their necks were stretched and their legs elongated. I didn’t know that their eyes were enlarged and moved about on their faces. It’s rather horrifying when you think about it.

heidi_klum_barbie_doll_sequin

Where do we draw the line between reality and fantasy when it comes to appearance? Cosmetics? Hair extensions? Fake tanning? Those are all very common appearance “enhancers” but some might argue that they’re dishonest too.

My personal opinion is that if you couldn’t be seen in person the way that your image appears, there’s some voodoo going on and it’s not on the up and up. My neck will never be longer, and I will not grow another inch taller, but I might tweeze my brows and put on a little lipstick.

No wonder we women look at ads and then turn a viciously critical eye on ourselves. “She must have more willpower,” we say. Well, yes, compared to me she doubtless does, but she’s also half digitized. In other words, fake.

Here’s to real women of all shapes, sizes, colors, and looks. There are so many versions of beauty that contorting an already beautiful woman into something less than human seems almost profane.