I’d like to take credit for Throwback Thursday, but of course I can’t. It’s been around for about a million years, give or take a few.

Still, I didn’t notice it all over facebook and everywhere else until I started doing my own little Throwback posts. Isn’t that the way? You think you’re doing something fun and out of the ordinary, then it turns out that everyone is doing the same thing.

Learning to speak Hindi? You’ll meet three people next week who are learning it as well. Thinking of moving to Siberia? Funny thing, your new next door neighbor just relocated from there. Think you just purchased the only purple car in town? Probably not, since you’ll notice one parked in the lot at work next week. Turns out that nothing is really original. Still, you have to follow your inspirations.

Speaking of inspiration, I’ve been sorely lacking it lately. As a result,  I’ve decided that maybe we should rename the days of the week. Here are my thoughts, as they pop into my head:

Melancholy Monday

Tumultuous Tuesday

Whiny Wednesday

Thick-headed Thursday

Fickle Friday

Slovenly Saturday

Sedentary Sunday

What do you think? They would bring some different ideas to mind for writing, that’s for sure. On Mondays we could reminisce and wax poetic about what might have been. On Tuesdays we can write about all hell breaking loose, both literally and figuratively. Wednesdays will be popular, I’m sure, as there’s no shortage of topics to whine about, from bratty neighbor kids, to paychecks that could always be larger to nasty grocery store clerks. Yes, I’m sure Wednesday would become the new favorite day of the week under this system.

Moving into the home stretch of the week, we could reflect on all of the boneheaded things we have done on Thick-headed Thursday. A little self-deprecation isn’t a bad thing, but if you’re not up for it, why not remember all of the boneheaded things other people have done? I know it always makes me feel better about myself when I realize that there are many people on earth who do a lot dumber things than I do. Finally, on Fickle Friday we could spend the last day of the work week on the fence, avoiding making decisions or standing by our convictions. We could spend the whole day waffling, and never have to commit to anything.

The weekend sounds like a blast too. On Slovenly Saturday we could spend the day in pajamas and eat ice cream out of the carton. Of course the dirty spoon can just sit on the coffee table along with that half read magazine and the empty box of sweet and salty cashew granola bars. Sedentary Sunday will find us on the couch under a pile of filth that we’re just too lazy to clean up, watching movies and avoiding responsibilities. It’s a perfect lead-in to, you guessed it, Melancholy Monday.

What do you think of the new week? Anybody in? No? I hope not. No matter how hokey or overdone they might be, I still prefer Marvelous Monday, Terrific Tuesday, Wonderful Wednesday, Thrilling Thursday, and Fun Friday. And the weekend? Well, that speaks for itself.