BulgingButtons

Not bad for a fat girl

Things My Mother Says

11 Comments

doughnutMy mother says it’s just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor man.

It’s a fact that there are many more poor men in the world than rich men.

My mother says that she does not eat doughnuts.

It’s a fact that round pastries with holes in the center and sweet sugar glaze are called doughnuts.

It’s a fact that my mother has eaten those pastries.

My mother says that she only eats what is good for her.

It’s a fact that there is chocolate in my mother’s house 100% of the time.

My mother says that she doesn’t understand why she can’t lose that last ten pounds.

It’s a fact that doughnuts and chocolate are high calorie, high fat foods.

It’s a fact that my mother doesn’t even need to lost ten pounds.

Author: BulgingButtons

I'm a middle aged woman doing the things that middle aged women do and trying not to beat myself up. I'm living the life I choose with the man I love, the teenage son who impresses me all the time, and the most adorable pup ever rescued from the euthanasia list. We live in the heat of the Southwest, where I regularly sweat through my Lane Bryant bras.

11 thoughts on “Things My Mother Says

  1. I stay away from doughnuts too… and I eat a handfull of cornflakes without sugar instead… and I’m totally unhappy with this pitiful “replacement”… sigh…. :o(

  2. This post takes me back to the night my friend called to tell me that a Krispy Kreme donut shop had opened up on West 72nd Street. She went on and on about the conveyor belt rolling freshly made donuts through a hot sugar curtain that glazed them to perfection. So it’s one in the morning and I wake my husband and tell him I am going to walk over to the new shop. It was a 24-7operation. He looked at me bleary eyed and mumbled “for donuts you’re walking 20 blocks in the middle of the night?” But he got up, got dressed, and tagged along grumbling all the way to the shop. The grumbling stopped once he saw and smelled that first shiny wheel. We took our first bites at the same time. We sighed deeply at exactly the same moment. And the manager seeing how happy he looked munching decided to give him a complimentary dozen to take home. He held carried that box the way Miss America carries her roses all the way home.

  3. A cute fun post that made me think of my own mom. Thanks for the smile (and love your mom – lolol) 🙂

  4. It’s a fact that this is hilarious. I dread the day my kids decide to post about my about my exploits. I have a passport stashed for just such an occasion.

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