Friends, it’s 138 degrees outside and I’m slowing turning into a large puddle of goo.

Okay, so the above sentence is an example of hyperbole (don’t you just love that word?), which is a literary device that ten year olds are supposed to know and use correctly, but I digress.

It’s hot out there. Yes, I live in the desert Southwest, and it’s June. Yes, I knew this was coming, and Yes, I’m more or less okay with it.

Here are a few ways to melt less:

1. Wear the right clothing. In my case that means a knit cotton sundress or a loose t-shirt and elastic-waist shorts. Nothing is tight, nothing chafes, and the fabric breathes. Yes! Sexy? Debatable. Practical? You bet!
2. Baby powder is your friend. I know, I know…if you use it in parts unknown you might have bad things happen to your bits and pieces. Well, my suggestion is DON’T do that. Use it where your parts rub together. Yes, that means along the bra line, ladies. Trust me, it helps.
3. Wet washcloths. This one is from my childhood. No matter how sticky and warm I feel at night, a rub down with a wet washcloth always seems to help. Not drying thoroughly helps too. Evaporation cools you off, at least a little, and you won’t feel so grubby either.
4. Fans, fans, fans. We’ve been keeping our air conditioning set to a higher temperature to save a little money, so we’ve been especially enjoying the fans. Ceiling fans are great for circulating the air, but floor fans are good too. Especially if you’ve just used tip number 3.
5. Water. Water in the body, water on the body, water surrounding the body. Drink it, bathe in it, swim in it, use it! Water is your friend.
6. Shade. If you must go outside seek shade. If you must leave your car in a parking lot, seek shade. Shade is so important that if you don’t have it you might need to create your own. Shade tents, long-sleeved shirts, and even umbrellas can save you from the sun’s wrath.
7. Relax. This is not the weather for marathon training, at least not outside. The less energy you expend, the cooler you’ll stay.
8. Take a cue from the kids. Eat a popsicle. Jump in a swimming pool. Run through the sprinkler. Munch on some watermelon, if you like that sort of thing (I do not). Relax and watch a movie. In other words, have a great time without over-doing it.

And don’t forget about your pets. DO NOT leave them out in extreme heat, even with shade and water they can meet a terrible fate. That goes double for the car. No living thing should be left in a car when the temperatures are well above one hundred degrees. I know you’ve heard it before, but it bears repeating…LEAVE NOBODY IN THE CAR in this heat.

If you take my advice you should be able to survive the explosion of your outdoor thermometer with no problem. Good luck, and keep cool!