change | BulgingButtons

Year two of college is starting for my kid, and today is his move-in day. Some observations about this event:

I know what to expect this year, so I have far fewer nerves (yes, it’s all about me!).
He knows what to expect, so he packed less stuff (not that he had much last year).
His father and I are taking him together, just like last year, in spite of being divorced for many years. I believe this is a good thing for all of us. He’s still our son and we’re still his parents. This transition, even if it isn’t the first time, is still kind of a big deal, and experiencing it all together validates that fact.
I’m hopeful that I’ll handle year two of him being away better than year one. Year one found me a bit down in the dumps, teetering on the edge of depression. I don’t want to go back there. Yes, I know he’s close by, and yes, he’s been great about staying in touch (weekly dinners and everything) but something about him being out of the house just unsettled me. I’m hopeful that I react better this time around.
I’m excited for him. He’s got this. He’s ready to go back and he’s ready for classes to begin and he’s ready to be more independent again. I’m happy for him.

The building he’s moving into is brand new. It’s built to house 1,600 students. Wow. I’m looking forward to seeing it in person, so far I’ve only gotten a sneak peek from the local news station. The kitchens on the floors are nicer than the one in my house, but I don’t see him using it much. There’s a fitness center in the building and 3-d printers and all sorts of other amenities. It’s a far cry from Gilbert 105, my first cinderblock-walled dorm room. Still, that old building was a wonderful place to make memories; I hope his new home is too.

If you’ve been reading this blog for more than ten minutes, you know that its main focus is change. Change in the form of getting healthy, change in the form of challenges, and change in the form of personal development. Change is good. It can be scary, or even paralyzing at times, but it’s inevitable, so you might as well embrace it. At least that’s my theory.

Not long ago, I was lamenting some little roadblock or other and my wise friend chimed in with her own thoughts. She said she often feels like her progress to get healthier is two steps forward, then one step back. Instead of complaining about this state of affairs, she pointed out that overall she was going in the right direction. Brilliant.

Life isn’t a walk along a straight path with a steady pace and no obstacles. How dull that would be. It’s more of a series of intricate moves, in fact it most closely resembles a dance. Dancers respond to music, just as we respond to the circumstances in our lives. Sometimes we move fluidly, and other times we’re out of step. There are times when we’re in synch with our partner and times when we can’t quite coordinate, and then, there are many times when we’re alone. There are also times when we’re on the sidelines, taken out by an injury or other trauma. Most of us get up and get back in the dance, though.

This dance of life is constantly changing. In one chapter it may be a ballet, smooth and elegant, another may be your own personal disco era. Any of those chapters may suit you perfectly, or you may find yourself lost and desperately waiting for new music to begin. For each of us the soundtrack is unique, and our attitudes and abilities determine how we respond to that music. Are you a tap dancing dervish or a fox trotting diva? And overall, are you moving through your life with grace and elegance, or are you bandaging blistered toes?