Not bad for a fat girl


The Purple Couch At Last

Portfolio-Kilby-Plum-Velvet-SoFast-Sofa-2baa0deb-7a1f-45d1-856f-ffdba1b1a0de_600Finally it arrived. The purple couch I bought from the internet on Black Friday has finally made its way into my living room, and I couldn’t be more relieved.

This poor couch has been hanging around town for the past week, just waiting to come home. It’s been in and out of the delivery company’s facilities and trucks, being manhandled along the way. How do I know? The combination of the scans it received along the way that made up its online “record” and the battered condition of its box when it finally made it to my doorstep. I’m a regular Sherlock Holmes.

Today was actually the sixth day that it was scheduled for delivery, but I held out little hope that it would actually arrive. I began to believe that it would eventually be sent back to the massive company from which I bought it, and I would never see it.

What lead me to this conclusion? After all, I’m the eternal optimist, the lover of flying pigs, the believer in the impossible. Well, I think the straw that broke the camel’s back was last night’s incident.  I was eagerly awaiting delivery (yet again) by sitting in the couchless living room watching the cars go by. Yes, I am that pathetic.

Well imagine my surprise (and yes, glee) when the delivery truck actually pulled up to our house. It was dark outside, and after 8 pm, but it was there. The driver turned off the lights, and did whatever it was that he/she did. I turned on the porch light, and kept myself from running outside. I was patient, but as the minutes ticked on, it occurred to me that my couch wasn’t coming off that truck.

After ten minutes the headlights popped back on, the truck made a u-turn, and it drove away. I was dumbfounded. I was stunned. I was numb. How. Could. That. Happen????????

That’s when I gave up hope. That’s when I decided I was not meant to have a purple velvet couch. That’s when I decided that it would never ever arrive. So of course, the next day it did.

I found out it was delivered at 4:28 pm. Of course I was still at work, and had to drive in the opposite direction to pick up my son. We arrived home after 6 and after dark. The whole time I was willing the thieves that steal people’s packages to stay away. Of course this package was the size of a fridge, but there are strong thieves with trucks, I’m sure of it. Lucky for me, it was still outside my front door when we arrived. I photographed the ripped box in case the contents were damaged, but fortunately everything was well protected. No tools were included, but we have our own, so that wasn’t a problem either.

My son and I built that couch with a few difficulties along the way, but it’s done and I’m satisfied. It looks terrific, but I’m pretty sure I’ll never buy a couch off the internet again. I just can’t take the drama and disappointment.


That Time I Bought a Purple Couch Off the Internet

Portfolio-Kilby-Plum-Velvet-SoFast-Sofa-2baa0deb-7a1f-45d1-856f-ffdba1b1a0de_600.jpgSo you may recall that yesterday was Black Friday in the USA, a day for dark forces to manipulate the population into behaving badly in the name of saving a buck or two. Or maybe it’s just a day with a bunch of really good sales to entice people to spend generously for Christmas. Either way, it’s all about the shopping.

Black Friday has always been something of a mystery to me, but I put it down to being Jewish and not having that NEED to go all out for Christmas gifts for my loved ones. Sure I’ve exchanged gifts, and yes, I have a kid who celebrates Christmas, but the whole Black Friday thing was something I just wasn’t interested in, especially after viewing video of people about ready to kill for Cabbage Patch Kids. They’re dolls, people. Ugly, ugly dolls.

I did go Black Friday shopping once, for a set of bedroom furniture for my son at Ikea. Nobody was there. It was AWESOME! Ikea is usually so busy, but on Black Friday all the shoppers were elsewhere. We strolled in like we owned the place, got all the furniture (which we had picked out previously), and strolled out. It was painless, we saved a lot of money, and we even ended up on the local news (yes, I’m famous).

Well, it seems like Black Friday is my day for furniture, because yesterday I purchased a couch. It is pictured above. Yes, it’s purple. I kind of love the color. Hopefully it looks pretty close to that in real life.

I’ve never bought furniture from the internet, but the reviews were good, the price was great, and it’ll be here before a local furniture store could get it here (or at least that’s what they say).

Hopefully it works out, after all, things are not always what they seem. I hope this couch is half as cool as it looks in the picture, and not too difficult to put together. Yes, we have to put it together. But the savings! The convenience! The purple! Cross your fingers for me. Black Friday might just be my lucky day.