Not bad for a fat girl

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Summer in Phoenix



Hot is a dog who won’t go outside,

preferring instead to sprawl across the tile floor

directly across from the air vent

Hot is the sensation that your paper parking permit

Will spontaneously combust between your fingertips

As you remove it from your windshield

Hot is a ponytail, braid, or bun

Morning, noon, and night

Hot is driving home from work

With the air conditioning on high

and pulling into the garage

before the car has cooled down

Hot is feeling apprehension every time you turn the ignition key

and feeling gratitude every time the car starts

Hot is waiting until later in the day

when the shadows appear

to go into the backyard pool

Hot is floor fans, ceiling fans, wet cloths, and water bottles

Hot is planning on cold cereal and yogurt for dinner

Hot is finding the one parking spot under the scrawny Palo Verde Tree

just for a little bit of shade

Hot is laundry. So much laundry.

Hot is choosing shoes with thicker soles

so you don’t feel as much of the heat coming up from the pavement

Hot is watching movies like Ice Age and Frozen

Even if there are no children in the house

Hot is extra chemicals for the pool

and extra water for the lawn

Hot is Phoenix in the summer

and no surprise

Hot is the temporary price we pay to live here

For that reason only, hot is okay.

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A Toe in the Water

It’s hot here. Extremely, exceptionally, terribly hot. Not only that, but the polished, glossy weather men and women keep telling us that it’s only getting hotter. How does 118 sound, folks? Move your weekend plans inside. Don’t leave your pets out. Drink plenty of water. Yup, it’s hot.

Yes, I have air conditioning. Living without it would be like winter in the Great Lakes without heat. In fact that is exactly what I tell my mother when she calls from that region in summer and asks me if I have the air on. Does anyone ask if you have the heat on when it’s 4 degrees out? Didn’t think so.

Still, even with the air conditioning on, it’s hot. After all, I’m not made of money so I don’t keep it set too low. It’s usually somewhere between 80 and 82, depending on the time of day. It’s also quite noisy as it’s doing its best to keep me comfortable in my little slice of Hades.  I don’t want to overwork it because I don’t want to kill it. And did I mention how much it costs to run that sucker? My electric bill in summer is a couple hundred bucks. Not being an heiress or hip hop star I do feel the pinch.

Long story short, I was hot last night, sticking to the leather sofa, and unable to cool down from the inside with a nice refreshing Fresca. Ugh. But then I remembered… I have a pool in my yard! I insisted on it when I bought my house two years ago. I spent a ton of money on it to get it up and running properly, and I dump in pricey chemicals to keep it pristine. It takes up virtually the whole yard, leaving just a slab for a couple of chairs and an umbrella. Why would I NOT use it?

You have to start somewhere.

Now it sounds like I never use it, which is untrue. I’m in there a couple of times a week (on a good week, anyway), but not nearly enough. I feel like I have this wonderful resource at my disposal and I need to take advantage of it. Once upon a time I used to be a lifeguard, complete with cute mesh shorts with the word “guard” emblazoned across my then size 14 butt. I loved the water then and still love it now. I need to use that love to my advantage. While the water’s warm (and it will be for a while) I need to get in that pool and GO!

For me it’s a little like this blog. I know how to write and share ideas, but I have to figure out the best way to do it and learn the ins and outs of blogging. I have to become competent with this platform, so that I can move through it easily and efficiently to achieve my goals. I’m not expecting perfection right away, just a  toe in will do for a start. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m heading back to the pool.