New House | BulgingButtons

My new home has a rather large master bathroom complete with a walk-in closet. It’s quite posh, really. It also features many mirrors. At least it seems that way. And these mirrors are hung at all sorts of angles from one another, creating something of a fun house effect. Or maybe house is horrors is closer to the truth. At least for me.

As I walk through the bathroom, I can’t help but view my entire body from angles that were previously unknown to me.

Picasso’s Girl Before a Mirror

Last night I caught sight of my full profile, and I stopped. I looked. I saw what everyone else sees all the time. You see, my body doesn’t carry weight the way most bodies do. I carry the majority of my extra weight in my belly, and it sticks way out. I am bigger front to back than side to side. When I look in the mirror I think I know what I look like, but I rarely catch a side view. Now I have one available all the time. Oh goody.

I stood there and gathered up as much of the belly fat as I could and took stock. There’s a lot. Then I let go and looked back in the mirror. I imagined what my body would look like if much of that belly were gone. Yes, there would still be plenty of jiggle to the thighs, and the back fat would still be in place. Yes, the beefy arms would still exist along with the double chin, but I would look pretty darn good. Not photoshop good, mind you, but fit and trim. That body could shop in a department that doesn’t have any sizes with the letter X in them. It would be nice, but it won’t happen by itself.

Those mirrors aren’t going away. They will remain in place to either encourage me or taunt me, as I see fit. It’s up to me to approach them with self love, not loathing. Too many of us hate our bodies, but our bodies deserve our care and tenderness, not our hateful thoughts. Regardless of the body I’m in, I will care for it and thank it for all the wonderful things it can do. And when I’m feeling really motivated, I’ll take it out for a spin, just to make sure all the parts are still working.

The Replacement Bulb

Did you know that halogen lightbulbs for pools installed in 1996 are difficult to come by? They are. There is one of them available in the United States right now, and it is currently in Dallas, Texas. I, however, am not currently in Dallas, Texas. It doesn’t matter though. I need that bulb. The bulb alone costs about $35.00, and then there’s the shipping cost. Of course if I want it in a hurry, it will cost more.

I have lived in this house for a little over two years and have never had a functioning pool light. Apparently I’ve been living on the edge, because this is a hazard, according to the inspection that was done on the house. It wasn’t a hazard back when my inspector looked at it, but now it is, and it’s up to me to remedy this situation so that my buyer doesn’t stub his toes in the dark when he goes night swimming. Having this responsibility makes me feel important, like I have a civic duty to keep my fellow human being safe from this apparently very real threat.

Why is it that when I’m the seller I have to bend over backward to change and fix everything, but when I’m the buyer I’m lucky if the air conditioning even works? The kicker is the house I’m selling is priced considerably less than the one I’m buying! Still, I’m really excited to say that I’m buying my next house. I found it last Friday, looked at it again on Sunday, and wrote an offer last night. This morning it was accepted. HOORAY! There are lots of good things about it, and a few things that are less great, but right now we’re not going there. Right now we’re trying to get out of THIS house. That means fixing a few things and packing a lot of things (well, everything actually) and doing lots of chores, like calling the utilities and setting up a forwarding address. What a pain.

I’m trying to remain calm and take things one step at a time. It’s tough, though, when all progress seems to grind to a halt over a single lightbulb (that I went to four stores to locate, then called two other places before, hopefully, finding it in Dallas). Hopefully the bulb issue will be resolved shortly, so that we can figure out why the new bathroom faucet is leaking. One step at a time. One step at a time.