In keeping with the ten things theme, here are a few interesting (to me anyway) bits of information about my mother.
1. Her first job was at Sears folding underwear. To this day she doesn’t shop at Sears. I think she holds a grudge.
2. Her parents, hardworking immigrants, gave her a car at age sixteen.
3. My mother took care of my father’s medical practice’s business side from home. She also filled in at the office when needed. She even had a cute white uniform for the job.
4. My mother used to be a sun worshipper. Did I mention that my dad was a dermatologist?
5. My mother used to be late for everything. I was always the last kid to be picked up from things. Now she’s habitually early. Weird.
6. My mother enjoys taking her 5 grandchildren out to lunch. I think it’s because she steals their french fries.
7. My mother’s favorite mug features a photo of my son and my niece when they were quite small. She drinks hot water from it. I’m not kidding.
8. My mother LOVES Zumba.
9. My mother has always had the most beautiful gardens, beginning when she was a young bride with a tiny yard.
10. My mother refused to give up on my father in the last years of his life, when he was terribly sick. She hired around the clock help, put a hospital bed in the family room, and wouldn’t hear a word about placing him in a nursing home. “He took care of me my whole life, now I’m taking care of him,” she would tell people. I never realized how strong she was until then.
Of course this is silly, since you don’t know anything about my dad. Still he was a very interesting guy and I could write a few volumes just about him. Here, though, are ten small bits of him.
1. He graduated from the University of Michigan, pre-med, in three years instead of four.
2. He had tons of quotes he would spout off, all the time. There was something for virtually every occasion. Toward the end of his life one of his favorites was, “give time, time.” Huh?
3. He took us to Israel when I was a kid and he brought back a shofar (ram’s horn) that he would sound at the Jewish High Holy Days. My brother has the shofar and continues the tradition.
4. He would wake up very early in the morning and read, mostly non-fiction. He had volumes and volumes of books on art, history, religion, anthropology, etc. They are all annotated with his underlines and comments, and many of them have accompanying articles tucked inside. He would correspond with authors and public figures too, and this was long before the internet.
5. He would cross the bridge to Canada to eat a burger because he didn’t want anyone to see him and report back to my mother about his indulgence.
6. He warned my brother that he might get cancer after purchasing a house near a radio tower. Sadly, it was my dad who got cancer.
7. My dad’s primary site for his cancer was in his brain. He was given a three month prognosis. He died seven years later. Long enough to walk me down the aisle. Long enough to meet my son.
8. It rained on the morning of my wedding. The venue called to say they were moving the ceremony inside. My father said no. He insisted that they stick to the original plan. It was a beautiful outdoor wedding, just as I had envisioned.
9. My dad’s mother lived a very long life. Up until the end she lived independently. My dad would often visit her and take a nap on her couch.
10. The last thing my dad said to me as he lay dying, robbed of most speech by Parkinson’s Disease, was, “I love you.”
I’ve always enjoyed playing games. Let me clarify that statement a bit. I’ve always enjoyed playing board games. I also like word games and guessing games and many other types of games, but some games I definitely do not enjoy.
I do not enjoy the kinds of games that people play with each other’s emotions. I do not enjoy the types of games that are often referred to as office politics. Forget those games. I appreciate clear and honest communication. Games should be left for recreational purposes only.
As a child, I played lots of games outdoors in the neighborhood. We were always running around, getting plenty of fresh air and exercise. Some of the games were “real” like Spud and kickball, while others were the product of our collaborative imaginations. Bean soccer was one such made up game. I don’t recall the rules, but if memory serves me, there were many. We didn’t have an obese generation, because we were all outside playing, as long as the weather would permit.
Where I grew up we often had bad weather. Since my generation did not have computers, video games, or more than three television stations (none of them with non-stop children’s programming), we had to figure out other things to do. I loved to read, draw, and make things, like legos or crafts. I also loved board games. I remember playing Careers and Life as a little girl, thinking about what my future would hold.
I never lost that love, and was thrilled when, as a young twenty-something, I worked with a group of people who would regularly hold a game night. We would bring our favorite games, break up into groups, and play. My favorite game of that era was Trivial Pursuit, hands down. My brain has always been crammed full of useless trivia, and this was my opportunity to let some of it out! Of course there were snacks and beverages, and lots of laughter. I remember those game nights fondly.
As a middle aged quilter, I had the wonderful opportunity to go on several quilting retreats with some remarkable people. Our group also had quite a few women who loved games, and we would bring some along. We would take periodic breaks from sewing to organize a game. Balderdash was a particular favorite with this group. The laughter and chance to let down our hair was priceless.
As a young mother I engaged my son in board games. They were wonderful for learning to take turns, count, and make decisions. They also helped him to develop his attention span, and learn to handle both winning and losing with grace. Most board games are more fun with three players, so his father was frequently recruited as well. We spent many happy times playing Candyland and Chutes and Ladders. Over time those games were replaced by Sorry and Clue, then Risk and Monopoly. When he was very small someone gave us a Pokemon Master Trainer game. We held on to it until he was old enough (I think the box said seven but I’m pretty sure he got it when he was four or five). It was probably his favorite board game. He loved Pokemon, and this game delighted him. After all these years I’m pretty sure we still have it somewhere.
I still enjoy the opportunity to take time away from real life and totally connect with others by playing a game. We are all focused on the same thing, there is no technology pulling our attention away from one another, and we put our other concerns on hold for a short while. I think I will always enjoy playing board games. Oh, and if we’re playing Trivial Pursuit, look out, I’m still pretty good.
3. My mother took care of my father’s medical practice’s business side from home. She also filled in at the office when needed. She even had a cute white uniform for the job.
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