Actually “reply” probably makes more sense, but I didn’t want you, dear reader, to think I was talking about you. I wasn’t. I was actually talking to the “helpful” bloggers who want to rid the world of blog posts they deem unworthy. I’ve seen lots of snarky and sarcastic comments about blogs that I don’t think are helpful at all. Maybe I’m missing the point. Perhaps they have been offered as satire. But I sort of don’t think so.
Telling new parents not to write about their babies is advice that’s likely to fall on deaf ears. Their new child is a wonder, and they want everyone to know about the amazing transformation they are participating in every day.
Not everyone who writes a blog is looking to be the next _________ (fill in your favorite writer here). Many people blog to keep in touch with far away family and friends, others do it just to get all those words that are swirling around inside of their heads out for some fresh air. We don’t all wish to be critiqued, even if we do hope to be read.
I understand that the internet is a public forum and whatever you put out there is fair game, but to offer criticism in the guise of advice seems unfair to me. It’s like your mama told you, if you don’t have something nice to say (or at least respectful and productive), then keep your big yap shut. New parents will tell you about every little thing their genius progeny does, from his rolling tummy to back prowess to her revolting sensitivity to dairy products.
New parents aren’t the only ones who do this. I’m a quilter. I read a lot of quilt blogs. If I were a more involved quilter I’m sure I would write many more posts about quilting. Would my experience of running out of thread in the middle of a big project be earth shattering? If it is, it’s only in my eyes. Still, I may wish to blog about the situation. Does that make me a bad or boring blogger? Not automatically. You would still have to read my post to find out. If you’re interested, that is.
What it boils down to is this: I think readers can judge for themselves what content appeals to them. Telling bloggers that there are hard and fast rules of blogging seems counterproductive to me. Blogging allows for instant publishing for the people, by the people. It’s very democratic, and as such you, dear reader, have the option of reading along, participating in the discussion, or passing any particular content by. Give the people choice, I say, and keep writing those cute baby stories. People really do read them.
Roughly three months ago I had my 47th birthday and decided to give myself some challenges for my 47th year. Some of them are coming along quite nicely, and others have yet to begin. Here’s a quick overview of how things are going for two reasons. First of all, there’s accountability. If I announce what I’m doing (or not doing) I’m more likely to progress toward my goals. Secondly, I want to give myself a push in the right direction. I have to revisit the goals to get them fresh in my mind again. Hopefully this won’t sting too much. I’ve included several links to posts that address particular goals, so feel free to poke around and read some.
1. Get at least one piece of writing published, in print, not via internet-not yet, but I am published in an online magazine, so it’s a start
2. Commit to eating home cooked meals at least four times a week (eMeals is helping with this one, check them out!)– sometimes yes, often no
3. Leave the house in plenty of time to not rush everymorning– this one has been going really great
4. Read 47 books –I’m only at nine (not including books I read to my students), but I’m off this week, so that number should go up! Check the facebook page for my reads.
5. Start a writing group –yes, but not the way I originally thought. I’m doing a writing group with kids. I also belong to a group, so starting a new one right now doesn’t seem to make sense.
6. Reconnect with old friends –I’m attending my college reunion next week, and there’s already talk a a high school reunion for next year. That conversation has gotten me back in touch with some friends from long ago.
7. Take my meds everyday until I no longer need them– Check! I finally figured out a method that works for me and never miss them now.
8. Use the treadmill at least once a week (hey, you have to start somewhere!)– honestly, no. More than before, but still not once a week.
9. Try Zumba (even though I have two leftfeet)– not yet
10. Finish the charity quilt on my sewing table-mortified to admit, but also not yet
11. Finish one UFO (unfinished object) per month (this would mostly bequilts)– uh, no
12. Eat more fruit– yes! I more or less like fruit now and have some almost every day.
13. Eat more vegetables –doing ok on this one, could do much better
14. Drink lesssoda-I was but now I’m not. Time to refocus on this one.
15. Teach my son to drive(eeeeeeek!)-not yet
16. Take the dog to the dog park at least once a week– not yet ( it’s been too flipping HOT)
17. Finish the office to make it a nice place to work (clear out clutter and organize)– and again, not yet (I’m seeing a pattern, gulp)
18. Donate unused items (just dropped off a bunch of items today but there’s more to get rid of) – this is ongoing but we could use another round
19. Leave work at a reasonable hour each day– most of the time I do
20. Limit pinterest addiction (it’s embarrassing, really)– I rarely go on Pinterest unless I’m looking for something specific. I don’t surf it though.
21. Keep on blogging! At least once a week share thoughts, ideas, challenges, triumphs, etc through this forum– YES!
22. Learn how to be a better blogger (and a more widely read blogger)– learning slowly but surely
23. Learn to box, really, I want pink boxing gloves and something to hit –I’ve started
24. Try to improve sleep habits –working on this one
25. Save up for a really cool family vacation-working on this one
26. Try to listen to my teenager better instead of just talking at him– this one is so so so hard
27. Talk to mom more– a couple of times a week
28. Discover more of my state (there are tons of hidden treasures I’ve never seen-not yet
29. Take more photos on my actual camera instead of my phone– working on this one
30. Learn some new aspects of the job I’ve been doing for a long time– working on this one too
31. Figure out some additional ways to get income into the household– I have two additional income opportunities I didn’t have three months ago, and the possibility of a third one
32. Take better care of my car (it has over 100,000 miles and it has to last!) – I did make it wait a while for its last oil change…
35. Surprise my sweetheart with a weekend away – not yet
36. Girls only day trip- probably in November
37. Climb that stupid mountain- haven’t even tried yet
38. Read magazines, then recycle (so hard to part with some of them, and no, I’m NOT a hoarder)- zero progress on this one (maybe I do have a few hoarder tendencies)
39. Push my limits in all ways –I could do better
40. Don’t forget to be kind, to myself and others – most of the time, yes
41. Look good in THOSE jeans again – not yet
42. Give myself a reason to replace my sneakers at this time next year – I better put some more miles on them
43. Sing even if I’m not great at it – yes, but mainly when nobody but the dog is around
44. Do more with less – doing pretty well with this
45. Get things done right away when possible-I suck at this, but I have been paying bills early
46. Have fun – I do
47. Enjoy life – ditto
Well, clearly I have some work to do, but on the flip side I’ve made a lot of positive strides in the past three months. I’m not disappointed by what I’ve learned through this little exercise. I know that these are achievable goals, and given a positive attitude and determination, I’m sure the next check in will show even more progress toward completing them.
The time? Now. The project? BulgingButtons, the blog. Let me be plain, nobody expected anything of me with this blog. I didn’t begin it as an assignment or challenge. Nobody told me I really ought to have a blog, or that they would read it if I did. In other words, there were absolutely no expectations at all. This fact made delivering more than expected a given. That being said, this blog still delivers in a pretty big way. It has a few things going for it that might not have been expected, especially by someone who knows me well.
First, I’ve been contributing to it regularly. I didn’t start it, create two or three posts, and then forget about it. I’ve been writing new content each week, and sometimes each day. This level of commitment to something that isn’t required of me is pretty impressive. Let’s face it, I’m a busy person and at the end of the day I like to chill out with the family on the couch like anyone else. Something about blogging has gotten under my skin, though, and I’m really motivated to keep writing and sharing new thoughts.
Secondly, my main topic of getting healthier has been a constant for the three months I’ve been blogging. This is also impressive, considering my past track record. Granted I haven’t made huge strides on the scale, but I’ve been doing some good things for myself, and pushing myself out of my comfort zone. I think the accountability of making my activities public has helped me to keep that trend going.
Finally, the majority of the posts I’ve written contain a bit more than simple journaling or self-serving baloney. They allow you, the reader, to get inside my head, and rattle around in there with me for a bit. I’m not embarrassed when I read back posts I’ve written. The voice I’m sharing with you is authentic, whether it’s hopeful, frustrated, or humorous. Whatever tone a particular piece takes, it comes from my heart as much as my head.
I’m not positive why this blogging thing has clicked with me so strongly. It may be that it gives me a voice that for so many years was quiet. Oh, it was always there, but I often suppressed it. I’m not one to have a huge circle of friends, although I enjoy other people very much. I’ve always had a few people very close to my heart, and they were the ones who saw my true colors. Now anyone who happens to click on bulging buttons.wordpress.com gets to come along for the ride too.
Telling new parents not to write about their babies is advice that’s likely to fall on deaf ears. Their new child is a wonder, and they want everyone to know about the amazing transformation they are participating in every day.
Would my experience of running out of thread in the middle of a big project be earth shattering? If it is, it’s only in my eyes. Still, I may wish to blog about the situation. Does that make me a bad or boring blogger? Not automatically. You would still have to read my post to find out. If you’re interested, that is.
BulgingButtons 