Today being Easter I can’t help but think of renewal. I’m not a Christian, but I do understand the significance of this day, and of the concept of resurrection. I find the idea that people can get another chance, even after death, uplifting- as do countless believers. While I’m not in the running for an eternal heavenly placement, I would like yet another chance here on earth.
I’m taking this opportunity to do some spring cleaning of various sorts. First there’s the bodily spring cleaning that needs to be done. Yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting with my doctor to review some lab reports. They were standard, nothing too worrisome, yet once again they pointed out that I’m stressing my body in ways that it doesn’t like.
Fewer calories, more exercise. Fewer sweets, more fruits and vegetables. Fewer stressors and more physical activities. I know all of this, and yet, here I am again, back where I began. Don’t believe me? Check out the 47 for 47 page that appeared last July. My progress has been poor, but I’m going to print out another check sheet and see if I can’t turn things around. I know my cheerleaders are here to help me, as always.
Another clean up project involves the blog. Not cleaning up, exactly, but straightening up. I almost deleted the projects page, until I realized that I still have projects to share, they’re just different than I originally anticipated. I’ve also included a Best of BB page so you can quickly find posts that others have found noteworthy. I do appreciate shares and reblogs, as long as you link back here, so by all means have at it.
Finally there’s the house. The blasted, blessed house. I’ve been working on cleaning and staging it so I can sell it at last. Today we did some landscaping touch ups, and it looks quite lovely, if I do say so myself. Yesterday we took another walk though one that I quite like, even if it does need some TLC. C’mon house, SELL!
So, in the spirit of new life, new growth, and renewal in general, I wish you a happy spring, and a season of joy and love.
Tomorrow is February 3. That means that in five months it will be my birthday. The day that will end the 47 for 47 Challenge year. On that day I will have either met my goals or not. I don’t anticipate sitting at the computer on my birthday studying the list, alternately congratulating myself and beating myself up, although I suppose that could happen. Just knowing that the list is there for all to see and wonder at is pretty powerful motivation to get going on some of those items.
The whole reason I began blogging was for me to spout off about how wonderful I am (or not) and how great a job I was doing taking care of myself (or not). Sadly, it’s been more of the not, but happily, the blog has grown beyond that original seed of an idea, so even with my many screw ups there’s still something interesting to read from time to time. There must be. People keep coming back, and new readers find me and follow BulgingButtons every day. How amazing is that?
But I digress. It’s a talent of mine. Not digression per se, but procrastination. I’m taking the long way around telling you that I’m ready to get back up on that horse. I’m ready to eat my fruits and veggies and do my exercise. I’m ready to drink my water and hold myself accountable. I’m ready to try again.
I know, you’ve heard it all before. You are patient, bearing with me all this time. You’ve listened to me wax poetic about delicious meals and sedentary pursuits. You’ve endured my whiny musings on feeling low, sick, discouraged, and frustrated. You’ve nodded politely when I’ve gotten excited about some small victory or another, and through it all you’ve hung in there with me. You are warriors.
You tune in hoping for some news of progress, some positive report from the front line, but I offer you little. A scrap here, a morsel there. Still, you support me. You forgive me my sins. You remind me that I’m only human, after all. You offer your hugs and support and encouragement and laughter. You open your worlds to me, and what do I give you in return?
Hopefully you know that I give you a piece of myself. I write from the heart (how disgustingly cliche, I’m sorry). I don’t sugar coat, and I don’t worry much about hurt feelings. I do, but not in my writing, because I’m generally a pretty open-minded nice person. I’m not likely to say anything cutting or mean, so I don’t worry about censoring myself, after all, I know I’m not going to yell at you. I’m far more likely to yell at me.
I try to give you something to think about, or smile at. I try to stay positive and upbeat and focus on the good things in life. I try to offer my observations and experiences in a way that’s interesting or thought provoking. I’m not trying to tell anyone who to be or what to think, but I’m allowing you all a glimpse of who I am and what I think. That doesn’t sound like a significant contribution to the good of humankind, but right now it’s what I’ve got to offer, take it or leave it.
This was supposed to be the year of loving myself enough to do all that I needed to make my life as wonderful as possible. I’ve done a lot of positive things, but I have so much more to do. It’s a little like getting my house ready to sell. I want to fixate on tiny inconsequential things at the expense of the obvious. In terms of the house it’s simple, CLEAN UP. In terms of my life it’s simple too, LOSE WEIGHT.
I think I can lose 50 pounds in 5 months. That’s sane and safe and would go a long way toward improving my health and life. There, I’ve written it. That makes it real.
I’m cleaning up and resisting the temptation to do silly things like rearrange drawers. I’m also committing to eating better and moving more. That’s about as much as I can handle right now. I did go to the grocery store and purchase some delicious mandarins, salad, yogurt, carrots, hummus, orange juice, and water to wash it all down.
I also purchased some light beer. Hey, it’s the Super Bowl, and the sweetheart is in the kitchen cooking his yearly pot of gourmet chili. I better take my walk before the festivities begin. Besides, the 3rd isn’t until tomorrow.
Did you catch The Biggest Loser last night? It was makeover week. The week where the remaining contestants, some of whom have lost over 100 pounds, get a professional makeover and see themselves in a new light. Tim Gunn of Project Runway does the wardrobe, and puts in his two cents about how fabulous everyone is, and some big name hair guy oversees color and cut. At the end of it all these folks looked fantastic, and they got to show off their new looks to their happy families.
Now I have to say, this is a fine looking group of people to begin with. The network chose them carefully, and they didn’t pick anyone who wasn’t handsome or pretty, even with the extra weight. They had plenty to work with, if the casting call I attended a while back was any indication. Hundreds of people wait for hours just to be glanced at for a moment at these calls. People also submit videos of themselves pleading their cases. Yes, there are a lot of fat people willing to sweat it out in front of a national audience. These are the ones who were picked and managed to stick around long enough to make it to makeover week. Good for them. It isn’t easy.
I would love to have my own makeover week. I would love to have a day when I grab some hot outfit off a rack in a size I haven’t seen since high school or earlier, and look in the mirror astounded. I would love some top notch stylist to study my features and hair and design a style that brings out the best in both. I would love to see a new version of the old me. But the thing is, those contestants earned that makeover day. They didn’t just stroll in with a credit card and buy it. They earned it with workout after workout, fruits and vegetables, sweat and tears. Good for them.
I hope to earn my makeover day sometime in the not so distant future. I want to feel that I deserve it too.
Today being Easter I can’t help but think of renewal. I’m not a Christian, but I do understand the significance of this day, and of the concept of resurrection. I find the idea that people can get another chance, even after death, uplifting- as do countless believers. While I’m not in the running for an eternal heavenly placement, I would like yet another chance here on earth.
Fewer calories, more exercise. Fewer sweets, more fruits and vegetables. Fewer stressors and more physical activities. I know all of this, and yet, here I am again, back where I began. Don’t believe me? Check out the 47 for 47 page that appeared last July. My progress has been poor, but I’m going to print out another check sheet and see if I can’t turn things around. I know my cheerleaders are here to help me, as always.
BulgingButtons 